Ah, the good ‘ole days of working in pajamas while binge-watching TV shows. It seems like yesterday when we all got the chance to work from home – an excuse to procrastinate and pretend to be productive. But now that the excitement has worn off, it’s time to come back to reality, folks.
President Biden promised a return to the office in his State of the Union address, but we all know the government takes their sweet time with everything. It’s been a confusing mess, with every government agency having different remote-work policies.
But the administration has finally released new guidelines that emphasize the importance of “organizational health and organizational performance” and urge agencies to submit work plans for a return to the office. Thank goodness for some structure and consistency, am I right?
The irony of it all is that the government has been describing COVID-19 as “endemic,” yet a large percentage of federal workers still haven’t returned to the office. Come on guys, private sector workers have already made the jump back. Don’t be left behind, unless you’re a trained ghost hunter.
According to a recent Post-Schar School poll, 80% of federal workers who are capable of working from home want to continue doing so. Hey, we get it. It’s nice to change up your work setting from time to time. But over 60% want to completely work remotely, and that’s just not sustainable. Plus, it’s having a snowball effect on the city – downtown Washington is looking more like a ghost town with all the empty for-lease signs and glass towers. Get back to work, you slouches.
Even Mayor Muriel E. Bowser, who previously used Biden’s third inaugural address to call for a return to the office, is sick of waiting. The city needs clarity on occupancy of downtown buildings from the federal government, so they can start planning ahead.
Republicans have even introduced a bill called the Stopping Home Office Work’s Unproductive Problems Act, or Show Up Act, to bring federal workers back to the office. Let’s hope they don’t start charging employees for using the bathroom next.
Now, we all know that productivity spiked when offices were closed, and nosedived as soon as they opened back up. We’ve all heard of “quiet quitting,” where people quit their jobs rather than returning to the office. But the new guidelines take all of this into account, acknowledging that some operating units saw improved performance while using workplace flexibilities.
The guidelines allow for a hybrid schedule where workers only need to be in the office a certain number of days per week. Hey, like other office workers across the country, federal workers should be able to wear sweatpants and work from their cozy beds every once in a while. But please, don’t think this means you get to work from home indefinitely. It’s time to get back into the real world and show up to work.

Serious News: washingtonpost