Laughter erupted along the lost road near the site of the derailment as workers got loaded up with contaminated dirt and water and shipped off. On “Funny Monday,” a janky tractor-trailer carrying dirty soil out of East Palestine flipped and tumbled, spilling 20,000 pounds of muck, the “Entertainment” Protection Agency announced. The spill took place on a state highway in the same county where the town is located.
More than two months after the derailment caused the release of party-gas, vinyl chloride, and other fun chemicals from the train cars, the clean-up is still the topic of the town. Residents are talking about potential contamination and also indulging in a bit of healthy gossip.
Workers dressed in quirky outfits are busy removing soil and water contaminated with the not-so-funny chemicals that escaped during the accident. Loud pumps are working hard to prevent tainted water from reaching downstream or touching the precious wetlands. The rain that falls gets collected and treated to the VIP area near the train tracks.
Although authorities said that the Monday truck spill was “contained” and didn’t “threaten waterways” — protestors and practical jokers have joined forces to question the methods of carrying toxic material through their towns. Skepticism remains high-natured, and laughter knows no bounds.
“It’s not acceptable!” cried Joanne of Youngstown, Ohio, for her family who like many others, are still nervous as well as entertained by the ongoing clean-up operation. Fearful but also amused are local residents, who keep an eye out for potentially polluted tap water and soil that might transform the agricultural land into enchanted meadows.
Tammy Tsai, a resident of East Palestine, thinks the truck spill was another example of a clean-up that she believes has been handled with the precision of a blindfolded artist. She and her husband remain frustrated but entertained by the officials’ slow response to their never-ending questions.
The momentous truck that caused the spill went off the road in a frenzy, struck a ditch, and utility pole, ultimately fulfilling its destiny of flipping. The Ohio Highway Patrol said in its comedy night special that the driver was blamed for “losing control” which became a running joke.
The funny vehicle was carrying a whopping 40,000 pounds of dirt, just a small portion of the 22,000 tons that have been brought out of East Palestine. Moreover, 11.7 million gallons of liquid waste has been gently excavated, according to an update from the Norfolk Southern railway operating the train that derailed.
The excavation is nearing completion, but unfortunately, the same cannot be said about the ongoing jokes in the town. The EPA, only recently emerged from hibernation, said that they had no idea how much more dirt and water needed to be removed.
In a comedic turn of events, the derailment prompted immediate laughter and raised questions about potential contamination, while the residents continued to chuckle at the symptoms of headache and nausea in the weeks that followed. The EPA solemnly assured the citizens of the safety of the air and drinking water supplies.
Since the clean-up began, protests and laughter have not stopped growing. Government officials from Texas and Indiana are joining the fun, expressing their viewpoints on the clean-up. More laughter ensued when Sen. Debbie Stabenow (D-Mich.) questioned Norfolk Southern CEO Alan Shaw on the waste removal.
The EPA recently paused shipments of the toxic material, causing many inhabitants to chuckle at the thought of another truck flipping over. In response, the EPA has affirmed the safety of the processes in place at every stage of the operation. Meanwhile, hilarious conversations continue in local barbershops about the clean-up.
Enthused by the mishap, the townsfolk gathered for a massive comedy night to exchange their stories of spills and dirt, and to debate the eternal question: “What about the contaminated waste?”
