HomeWorldHilarious Hijinks in Sudan: Paramilitary Group Claims to be Palace-Sitters

Hilarious Hijinks in Sudan: Paramilitary Group Claims to be Palace-Sitters

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Well folks, there’s been quite the nut battle in Sudan! And no, we’re not talking about a food fight here. Gunfights in the streets have raised fears of a wider conflict in a country facing economic troubles. Yikes, talk about needing some therapy.

The U.S. ambassador to Sudan, John Godfrey, woke up to “the deeply disturbing sounds of gunfire and fighting.” That’s definitely not the alarm clock tune you want to wake up to! He called on senior military leaders to stop the fighting, but as it turns out, they didn’t listen.

Witnesses reported seeing armored vehicles and plumes of smoke rising in the city. Mothers dashed to get their children from school, as bridges were blocked and people tried to go home under gunfire. Sounds like recess got a little out of hand…

In Khartoum, a Save the Children staff member said there was “a lot of artillery and shooting” since the morning, and gunshots were heard in the city of Omdurman. Who needs a movie when you can just hear all the action outside?

“There are armored personnel carriers and troops deploying,” said another witness. “I can hear heavy weapons in the distance.” Excuse me, did we miss the memo that Sudan is hosting a war reenactment?

Commercial aircraft trying to land in the capital had started turning around. Well, that’s one way to avoid a layover. Maybe these pilots should look into becoming stunt pilots for movies?

The army said it was fighting RSF attempts to seize the presidential palace and the residence of the army chief. It added that the Sudanese air force was conducting operations against RSF positions. Talk about playing a classic game of Capture the Flag, but on a slightly larger scale.

Sudan “is on the precipice of civil war,” said Alan Boswell, director for the Horn of Africa for the International Crisis Group. He also wrote in a tweet that the situation would require “high-level diplomacy” after days of rising tensions between the armed forces and the RSF. Looks like Sudan needs some couples therapy to reconcile their differences.

Serious News: washingtonpost

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