Well, you won’t believe what I read in this email from Professor Nughes to Mr. Brown. Apparently, our anthropology professor has made quite the discovery. Brace yourselves, folks, because according to Nughes, students actually want to read and be part of communities with differing opinions. Who knew, right?

Now, onto the real juicy stuff. The students have been holed up in the library for over a week, preparing for their finals. But wait, they haven’t just been studying! Oh no, they’ve been livin’ it up, playing board games and feasting on croissants and granola. I’m starting to think they’re enjoying themselves a little too much.

But here’s where things get spicy. The students suspect the university is trying to pull a fast one on them by waiting until summer break to dismantle the library. And they’re not havin’ it. They’ve declared that they’re staying in the library until they get what they want. You go, guys!

And finally, we have the wise words of Mr. Molloy. He’s the voice of reason in this chaos. All he wants is for the university to give up the goods and hand over the library so everyone can go home. Seems pretty straightforward to me, but what do I know?

Serious News: nytimes